Do you keep your husband captive for something he did many years ago? Do you hold onto a grudge and rehash it from time to time? Do you throw past mistakes up in his face when you get angry?

How ugly and sad we can be sometimes. Do we like to feel powerful and hurtful? Do we think it is fun to tear down someone’s spirit?

Bitterness and resentment only hurt the one who is holding onto it.



Do you always have to have the last word? Do you always have to be right about everything?

When you put two different people together they are going to disagree sometimes.

Is it that important to fight over? Is it that vital to stay made and not talk to each other for a week? If it mean life or death, then yes!

Most people who get in an argument and stay mad for a long time forget what it was that made them mad in the first place.

You can agree to disagree. Just don’t have knock down drag out fights over little things.



Do you tend to see the good in things or the bad? Are you a positive person or a negative one? I do not like to be around negative people, or people who are always griping.

Don’t be like a vulture, always hovering around looking for something to devour, looking for someone’s eyes to pick out, looking for someone to tear to pieces.

I would rather be like a butterfly and give someone a soft gentle touch, or be a song bird with soothing words, or a hummingbird that everyone is happy to see.

You can choose a positive path for your marriage instead of a negative one. You can think about the positive points of your marriage instead of the negative.

Don’t be a fault finder, in your husband or others. Don’t complain about the things that didn’t get done, be thankful for the tasks that were completed. Look for the good.


My husband has always said he wants to sell our house and buy a motor home when he retires. I never wanted to sell my house. I told him we could go traveling in the winter and live at home in the summer. I would want to be ‘home’ for the major holidays. Now I think I am ready to sell the house. It is just a dwelling place for us anyway. We can live anywhere.

This house that is made of wood and siding can burn up in a fire or be picked up in a tornado. Would I cry? The only real possessions I would not like to lose would be my pictures. You can’t take it with you anyway!!

My heart is with my husband, wherever that may be.


Sorry, I don’t have a marriage post for today. My son called me this morning. He broke his ankle about 10 years ago, and when he woke up this morning he couldn’t walk on it. I have been running him to the doctor’s office and hospital for x-rays. They said nothing is broken.

We moved my mom and he did a lot of yard work over the past two weeks. I think he just aggravated it too much. There is something called Plantar Fasciitis, it might be that.

Whatever it is, is was nice that my grown son needed me today.


“Some marriages are made in heaven, but they all have to be maintained on earth. Mrs. Miracle” ― Debbie Macomber

Brand new cars are wonderful. Everything is shiny and new. Everything is runs smoothly. Does is stay shiny and new? Does everything always run smoothly? What would happen if you never maintained your car? You won’t be driving it long. It would get ruined.

Being newly married is wonderful. Everything is perfect. Everyone is so happy. Does it always stay that way? Does everything always run smoothly? What would happen if you never maintained your marriage? Do we take more stock in our car than our marriage?

Sure little fights and arguments will come up. Sure some fender benders will happen. Sure even some big crash, bang, and smash ‘em ups may happen. Do you just quit and walk away from it all, or do you try to fix it and bring it back to its original state?

Work on the small problems before they blow up. Work on the small problems before they cause greater damage. Work on the small problems before they cause irreparable damage.

I want to care for, protect, keep up, and repair my marriage. I don’t want it to fall apart or break down. I don’t want to be another wreck in the junkyard!



“I want to try with someone who loves me enough to try with me. I want to grow old looking at the same face every morning. I want to grow old looking at the same face every night at the dinner table. I want to be one of those old couples you see still holding hands and laughing after fifty years of marriage. That’s what I want. I want to be someone’s forever.” ― Rachel Gibson, The Trouble With Valentine’s Day

YES! That is what I want. I want him to love me enough to work on things that need to be changed. I want him to be willing to try. I want to look at the same person every morning and night. I want to have that calloused hand to hold everyday. I want to smell that familiar scent everyday. I want to hear those hard footsteps walking through the house. I even might want to hear that same snoring each night, just for a little bit. I want to be able to make him belly laugh with me. I want to be his forever!


“If I get married, I want to be very married.” ― Audrey Hepburn

What does ‘be very married’ mean to me? I had to think about that one awhile.

I want my husband to be very married to me by not wanting another woman. Are there prettier women out there? Yes! Are there skinnier women out there? Yes!! How can I make sure he doesn’t want one of those women? I need to work on myself to be the best me I can be.

I want my husband to be very married to me by sharing our lives together. I want him to include me in things he does, even if I don’t care for them. I want him to include me in making big decisions, I don’t want to be left out. If he doesn’t like my ideas, at least he heard them.

I want my husband to be very married to me by being there for me. I have back problems and RA. My husband is here for me when I need him. I have good days and bad days. He is still here. He comes home every day after work. He has even taken over the job of vacuuming for me. He is my shoulder to lean on and cry on.

I want to be very married and stay very married.



“Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.” ― Katharine Hepburn

This made me laugh. Should we just be neighbors and be friendly to each other only when we see each other? Should we just visit over the back fence or sit on each other’s porch and drink tea? Is that what real life is all about?

If supper is a little late, would you yell at the neighbor lady to hurry up and get it on the table? If the towels are on the floor, would you yell at the neighbor man to pick them up?

Why do we treat strangers better than the ones we live with everyday? The are there through the thick and thin, the good and bad.

You can turn someone off by your bad attitude. You can wear someone down by the words that come out of your mouth.
Your family should be there for you no matter what. Treat them with kindness and care. You never know if you will have to rely on them some day.



“People always fall in love with the most perfect aspects of each other’s personalities. Who wouldn’t? Anybody can love the most wonderful parts of another person. But that’s not the clever trick. The really clever trick is this: Can you accept the flaws? Can you look at your partner’s faults honestly and say, ‘I can work around that. I can make something out of it.’? Because the good stuff is always going to be there, and it’s always going to pretty and sparkly…”
― Elizabeth Gilbert, Committed: A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage

Remember I told you that when my husband chews on his ice it is like fingernails on a chalkboard to me? When we were first dating I overlooked it. Now, not so much! One time we went to the drive-thru of a fast food restaurant and ate it in the car. He drank his pop all gone and started to chomp on his ice. I took the cup and threw the whole thing out of the window. Not a very nice thing to do, but it was better than what I wanted to do!

Try to see the good and overlook the bad. The bad stuff can overtake the good, if you let it.


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Home Life and Being Married 25+ Years To My Husband

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